Stop

“… When I met Papaji, it was as if he was parenting me in a way that my parents weren’t equipped to, and I did look up to him. I mean, I still do. I did revere him, and I recognized that what he was offering was precious. So that is present, but it doesn’t mean that I saw him as having to be infallible in some kind of idealistic way. I recognized that he could be a full human being and yet what he offered me was so huge that I was at his feet. I don’t allow people to be at my feet – we’re in a different culture – but I think the respect that comes from receiving a true teaching or a true transmission is valid and important, so that you don’t trivialize it… because it’s something that is extraordinary... We are human beings, and because we are human beings and we have minds we reconstruct reality at a safe distance, but once it has been penetrated, we also know that at a deeper place...

We were sitting on the bed laughing, and just reveling in our good fortune at meeting Papaji and just speaking of the dharma and one of the wonderful conversations, but really just overflowing in love and recognition of good fortune and then there was just a, I couldn’t, it was not in time awareness, it was less than an instant, and there was just, I didn’t even know it was there, but there was a removal of self-doubt, there was something that, to even say that it fell away, puts it in time, like there was some progression. It was just, pop! And all of a sudden I really recognized without a doubt that it is impossible for me to be separate from anything that I am aware of, anything that I am experiencing. And it just was an incredible moment and the reverberations of that moment are still present…

In my meeting Papaji… my mind was at ease. I wasn’t trying to figure anything out… I said “So, how do I get freedom?” And I really was expecting him to give me some teaching or some mantra or some special practices, I didn’t know what he said to people. And he said, “Stop.” And at first I took that in pretty superficially. I thought he meant like a vipassana retreat, or something – just don’t move. And then it was clear it was something deeper than that, and finally that very word just stopped, turned my attention to the activity of my mind and I saw, I recognized, and more deeply over time, that my mind – my thinking mind – was going… it was really a search for ‘who am I?’
In an instant my mind stopped… my thinking mind. My thoughts stopped. A consciousness was fully here, and that was the beginning …

The example I love to give, is if you are kissing somebody, if you are thinking, you are not really kissing. And when you are really kissing, you don’t need to think. And that’s true with life. If you are embracing and being embraced by life, you don’t need to think. Thought clearly has a place, but in our Western culture we’ve given thought primacy, and as a result we are trying to think our way to enlightenment. Think our way to peace. Think our way to freedom. And with that we are just accumulating more knowledge and fighting ideas of ourselves that conflict with that knowledge. And so really Papaji was inviting me in transmitting this possibility to throw away the measuring stick, throw away the knowledge and recognize who you are… Just close your eyes and allow the kiss...

I do still throw beanbags at someone who is too involved in their story… the stories that are dysfunctional are the ones we tell about who we are, and the most dysfunctional ones are the ones we tell about who we are, and the most dysfunctional ones are the ones we don’t know we are telling about who we are...
Usually our story is where there’s the inner sanctum story or proficient story, some attempt to make sense of that or to control that or escape that, and so the invitation to inquiry is to actually open to that, because that is the life force, it’s consciousness discovering itself as being and in that direct discovery there is an abundance of joy...

I often speak of Papaji telling me, “Stop” and how important that is and really what I feel I am here to say to people is that you can trust yourself. And when I say yourself, I am not thinking of your thoughts, which aren’t trustworthy, or your emotions, which aren’t trustworthy, and they also aren’t the problem, but your Self. The truth of who you are from the initial arising of this either recognition or desire for a bigger life, a freer life, an enlightened life, however defined, this is trustworthy. It is your own Self calling you home… Honor this, listen to this. Put your full attention on this and it delivers everything that is necessary.”

~ Gangaji travels the world speaking to seekers from all walks of life. A teacher and author, she shares her direct experience of the essential message she received from Papaji and offers it to all who want to discover a true and lasting fulfillment. Through her life and words, she powerfully articulates how it is really possible to discover the truth of who you are and to be true to that discovery.