Eighteen Thousand Wives

"Lord Krishna had eighteen thousand wives and his legal wife was Rukhmani. Naarad came. Rishi Naarad is the great disciple of the God Naaraayan, whose job is to go everywhere and test people who worship God. For all those who are on a devotional path, Naarad is the angel. It is a divine angel who comes and tests them all, and freaks them out.

So when Lord Krishna was sitting one day in his darbaar, in his court, Naarad came saying, “Naaraayan, Naaraayan.”Lord Krishna got up, paid his respects, made him sit and said, “Bhagwaan, why have you come?”Naarad said, “I have a problem.”Lord Krishna asked, “What is your problem?”He said, “I am very horny. I feel very sexual. All my life I have said, ‘Naaraayan, Naaraayan,’but now I am not going to say it anymore. I need to have and I want to enjoy a woman. And I found out that in the world, at this time, you are the Lord of the Universe and also, that you have eighteen thousand. Why don't you give me one?”

Naarad was very serious, but Lord Krishna was not. Lord Krishna said, “Are you serious?”He said, “Absolutely serious. This is the truth. I want to live with a woman, maybe for one night, but I cannot go and talk about this thing with anybody, so I want to talk to you in confidence. Keep my secret and just spare one of your wives for one night. You have eighteen thousand. It takes eighteen thousand days if you complete the cycle. So what is wrong? Give me one.”

He said, “Naarad, I'll give you one, but on one condition. If you cannot have intercourse with her, you'll remain celibate the rest of your life and you'll never again go to anybody with this question.”Naarad said, “Okay, fine.”So, when the evening came, the lights were put out. Lord Krishna said, “Naarad, these are eighteen thousand mahols, the places where my gopis, my wives, live. Go to any one. This is the master key. It will open every door. And whosoever is alone, you can sleep with her.”Naarad took the master key, went and opened every door. He found Krishna with everybody.

So the next morning Naarad met him again at breakfast and Lord Krishna said, “Did you get what you wanted?”He returned the key and said, “I am going to be permanently celibate the rest of my life. But Krishna, you are not eighteen thousand. Tell me the secret of this thing.”Krishna smiled, laughed, and cracked up. He said, “Naarad, I was not sleeping with anybody. I was right here! You could have slept the whole night with me. It would have been all right. It is they, it is their worship and their devotion, it is their sincerity and it is in their purity that they created me. Because the bhagta, the beloved, creates the lover. The lover never creates the beloved.”

-- Yogi Bhajan